Clarence has to get his pig eating again or he will lose the Fattest Pig prize to his fiendish rival. Meanwhile, Connie demands he put a stop to his niece Angela's love affair with cowboy Jimmy.

Connie hires a personal secretary, Baxter, to tidy up Blandings and Clarence and to impress the visiting Schoonmakers. But Freddie's attempts to sell them dog food contribute to the extreme discomfort of the occasion.

Clarence hopes to avoid dancing with his niece Gertrude by inviting a convenient blockhead to keep her company. Freddie meanwhile must keep his new Portuguese wife a secret from Connie. Guest starring David Bamber as Herr Schnelllhund. Clarence’s lugubrious niece Gertrude has been imprisoned at Blandings by Connie and forced to overhaul Clarence’s library. Her ministrations are driving him crazy. Gertrude’s forbidden love, the outstandingly clumsy Revd. Beefy Bingham, infiltrates Blandings using a false identity. He is determined to win Clarence’s approval for the match. Meanwhile, Freddie has inadvertently married a Portuguese exotic dancer and must do his utmost to keep that a secret from Connie.

Baxter returns as a holiday tutor for Clarence’s grandson George. To Clarence’s horror, Baxter plans to weasel his way back into permanent employment at Blandings. Guest starring Paloma Faith as Georgia and David Walliams as Baxter. Blandings is threatened by the return of dictatorial secretary Baxter, hired by Connie to put an end to all tomfoolery. This is a tragedy for Clarence; but he finds an unusual ally in his grandson George, who has been happily rampaging through the grounds with an air rifle. It is not long before there is an outbreak of clandestine shooting and smarting buttocks. Meanwhile, Freddie returns to coax Clarence into to clearing his debts. This time he is pursued by East End gangsters and brings with him a beguiling dancer who takes a fancy to Beach.

It is the annual fete at Blandings Castle, and Connie will again force Clarence to wear a revolting top hat and stumble his way humiliatingly through a speech. Worst of all, he is banned from picking his beloved flowers by the tyrannical head gardener Angus McAllister. However, Clarence befriends Gladys and Ern, two cheeky schoolchildren who encourage him to assert himself. Connie is naturally scandalized, and brings her howitzers to bear on the ghastly intruders. Freddie - needing to touch his old man for some cash - struggles to help Clarence and the children; inevitably he makes everything worse.

Clarence is forced to make polite conversation with the dowager Lady Daphne, but her interest in Clarence’s pig arouses Connie’s and Beach’s suspicions. Guest starring Jessica Hynes as Daphne. With the arrival of sophisticated widow Daphne and her spoiled brat Huxley, Connie once again forces Clarence to look presentable. However, when Daphne flirts with Clarence and takes an interest in his pig, Beach and Connie become suspicious of Daphne’s motives. Freddie announces that he has forsworn women of every description – only to find a glorious and titanic beauty, Monica Simmons, working in the pigsty.